Author Archives: Idgaf

PUBG on Xbox is awful and compelling

PUBG on Xbox shouldn’t have been released in the state it is now.  Terrible frate issues, rubberbanding and a nonsensical (and graphically confusing) UI.  I am playing on an original Xbox ONe.

But with three other players, it affords a kind of creativity and coordination that one doesn’t normally see in games.  An unpredictability of experience that lends itself to tension and discussion.

I ordered a copy before it released, so my money is already gone.  I voted with my wallet too quickly and rewarded Bluehole and Microsoft for releasing a shittily-made product.  I can’t fully recommend it in good conscience, even though I’m enjoying it.

But I’ll probably be playing it tonight, all the time cursing how poorly it runs.

Horizon Zero Dawn’s weird weapon system

Horizon Zero Dawn limits you to four weapons on your character at a time  – but you can swap them out for extra weapons in your inventory at any time.  Eh?

Horizon Zero Dawn lets you carry multiple weapons in your inventory.  I think it’s six or eight.

However during gameplay, you can only carry four of those weapons.  This isn’t a true limitation though, because at any point you can pause the game, go into your inventory and swap them.

Thus, in practical terms you have access to any of your weapons at any time, but only if you go through the rigmarole of inventory management.

Why have the inventory stage at all?   By letting me swap quickly between any weapon as you’re fighting, you’d encourage people to experiment in gameplay.

 

 

What in-game timers were replaced by shrinking screens?

What if in-game timers were replaced by screens that started shrinking, making the play space smaller and smaller?

Speed Runners is a 2D platformer/racing game.  As a race goes on, the  playspace will start to shrink.   Anyone caught outside the space, because they were too far away from the player in first, will lose.

 

It struck me that, in terms of provking aggressive play, shrinking screens and in-game timers are similar.  As the screen shrinks, you try to run faster.  As the clock counts down, you play harder to secure a victory.

But what would happen if we replaced all in-game timers with shrinking screens?

How would that affect gameplay?

 

 

Would limiting moped passengers lessen moped crime?

Moped crime is big news in London.   Two people on a moped drive past someone looking at their phone.  Phone is stolen.   But what if there was only one person on it?

I rarely ever see two people on a moped in London.  When I do, I wonder if they’re out to rob people.  Rider rides, passenger steals.

I wonder if making it illegal to be a pillion passenger on a moped would limit crime.   I don’t think it would affect commuters, who ride solo, but may be an easy way for the police to spot people that might be up to no good.

Invent a fighting game using characters from films. No superheroes.

Pick any non-superhero character from a film and put it into a fighting game.  What’s it’s special movie?  (Accidental pun.)

What kind of match-ups could you come up with?

I’d start with Zatoichi, the blind swordsman.  In an online game he could make his opponent’s screen go black, so the player would only see the flash of his sword.

Next, I’d have Lassie.  She’d be able to call other characters for help.  Or maybe her special movie would be dropping the enemy down a well.

What would you have?

 

How to unstick a bucket

Stick a hose down the side of the buckets and let water flow between them.   The gap between the bottom of the buckets will fill.  The water pressure will unstick them.

I’ve had two buckets stuck together for months.  To make it worse, there was dried mud between them and they were ridged, and the ridges were pushing against each other.

I tried everything.  Prizing them apart, bending them and trying to hold one down with my feet while pulling on the other.

The videos I found suggested using a compressed air line from a garage, but I didn’t have that.   One day I realise that it didn’t matter what was providing the pressure to push.  Water would work.

I first stuck the hose as far down as it would go and cranked the tap.  The water spurted backwards and started flowing out, faster than it was pushing up.

When I let the water flow more smoothly and slowly, the gap between the buckets filled and they pushed themselves apart.